I’ve been neglectful. Neglectful of any readers I may have. Neglectful of any writing I’m trying to do. Neglectful of my house.
I have come to the conclusion that I can do only so many things at one time. This may seem obvious to some, but not to me. I still hold on to this delusion that I can have and do it all. Silly and naïve, I know.
The holidays were magical for the children. They had a wonderful time. We had loads of houseguests. The first relatives were in prior to and through the holidays. The second group came after the holidays. The third group comes tomorrow for New Years. All have had a nice time. We hosted Christmas at our house. It went well.
I swore it would be different this year. I would share more responsibility and workload. I would concede some things and not try to achieve perfection.
I am exhausted.
I am the only one for whom the holidays might not have been so magical-just tiresome.
We did too much. We hosted too much. We ran around too much.
I want to just be still.
To be bored.
Is this possible any more? Are others capable of this and just not me? I’ve read the other mom blog descriptions of their days and everyone seems to have relished in the wonder of it all. Cherished the traditions. I feel that. Less this year than others. But, am I the only one spent?
I’m going to get there next year. It’s my New Year’s resolution. I’m taking back my holiday. Mine. Hopefully, it won’t wreak havoc on anyone else’s idea of what that means.